Idjit being a freaking idjit

[compy]

So.

Got to the barn this afternoon to a horse that CLEARLY thought he had been neglected and it had been WAAAY too long since he'd had a boatload of carrots.

whicker whicker whicker
where ya been?
where's my carrots?
do you have any more?
nonono don't let that dog have any of mah carrots!
nom nom nom
got any more? smooches

So i got whiskery kisses and idjit got a pound of carrots.

It was dry and sunny when I finished grooming Idjit so I turned him out in a grass paddock.

I set about picking his stall and gabbing with the other boarders when the sky SUDDENLY clouded over and the heavens opened up. and lightening struck. and thunder boomed.

Whoops.

By the time I got outside the barn, Idjit was in hysterics and GALLOPING around the pasture. Remember this is an arthritic old horse who cant trot very well and never moves fast any more. Obviously he had completely forgotten his youth when he lived outdoors year around, rain or shine, through tornadoes, hailstorms, and blizzards.

Thank goodness he still had enough brain cells working that he knew I was his connection to shelter. When I got to the gate, he skidded to a halt in front of me (yeah, I got a mud shower) and let me put on his halter.

But outside the gate, he bid his brain farewell. Yee haw. He was bucking at the raindrops slamming on his outraged butt. And trying to gallop back to the barn. Well, I don't move that fast, so he was galloping circles around me and I was edging toward the barn.

Then help arrived. NO GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY WAY (said quietly and politely between Whoas and Easy Boys) CLEAR the AISLE (could you please get the other horses off cross ties?)

So there I was hanging onto his halter as we speed 'walked' down a barn aisle that suddenly seemed to be a mile long.


And that big ole white dog? the one that was stealing carrots earlier? a dog Idjit likes? the one that was snoozing off to one side of the aisle? OMG IT WAS TRANSFORMED INTO A HORSE EATING DRAGON!!!

Idjit levitated and spooked sideways, pushing me into the face of a very recently gelded Andalusian, who objected. Strenuously.

Horses scream when sufficiently annoyed.

Fortunately I was still hanging onto Idjit's halter, and HE was leaving the vicinity of the dragon and the Andalusian with all dispatch. The safety of his stall was reached, forthwith.

Whew.


All's well that ends well.

My ears are ringing.